As of yesterday morning, I officially became a member of Urban Empowerment (Church here in Columbia). This is my very first church home that I've ever had. This is a big deal to me (even though I still have to complete the new membership class...but I digress). I've been going there for sometime now. Popping in a few times back in 2008 (my freshman year) and more and more these past two semesters. I'm still learning people's names, even though I know their faces, and am enamored by the choir. Both Bishop and Pastor Woods are two wonderful individuals who, without knowing, kept pulling on my heartstrings to join the church. Many members have already fell in love with Addyson and she loves playing with the other kids in the Children Playroom.
I've toyed around with religion for a while now. Church-hopping from Jehovah Witness as a young child, my grandmothers church on holidays, and my friend's church whenever they would invite me. I was never attending for the sake of getting a word or changing lifestyles. I was never there to form relationships with others who were mature in Christ and could help me. I was just...there. The older I got, things started to make sense to me, but not enough for me to want to make it a habit. As soon as I stepped out of the four walls of the church, I was back at where I was prior to ever walking in. Even when I began attending UE. I felt like everytime I stepped in the church, the word was tailored towards my specific situation. Both Bishop and Pastor Woods had a way of connecting with youth; preparing their message to relate to the youth so it would make sense to us. I would go to the alter; I would cry when a word twinged in my spirit; I would be on fire when I left. But as soon as Monday came around and I had other "obligations," that word no longer lingered in me. I got tired of that feeling. I would surround myself in negative situations with negative people, and in the pit of my stomach, I always knew I just didn't belong. I was never at ease. I would always feel guilty after doing things I knew I wasn't supposed to. I was tired of feeling like that. Then I remembered the feeling I would get whenever I was on fire for God. Whenever I would talk to him and seek his guidance and the warm sensation that would pour over me. I always want that feeling. Not just on Sundays at church or Wednesdays at Bible Study. I want to have that feeling even in my darkest hours because I know ultimately God has my back and whatever I am going through, it is not bigger than God. I want that massive amount of faith. So finally, after 21 years of playing around, I decided to dedicate myself to this church. I have yet to be baptized but it is coming next. I am held accountable now, which is fine. The same feeling I get when I know I have class on Monday or an assignment due on Tuesday, I want to feel that way about God. God is waiting to talk to me so I have to go and make time for him. Same scenario. I am very blessed and excited to become apart of this family. :)
I've toyed around with religion for a while now. Church-hopping from Jehovah Witness as a young child, my grandmothers church on holidays, and my friend's church whenever they would invite me. I was never attending for the sake of getting a word or changing lifestyles. I was never there to form relationships with others who were mature in Christ and could help me. I was just...there. The older I got, things started to make sense to me, but not enough for me to want to make it a habit. As soon as I stepped out of the four walls of the church, I was back at where I was prior to ever walking in. Even when I began attending UE. I felt like everytime I stepped in the church, the word was tailored towards my specific situation. Both Bishop and Pastor Woods had a way of connecting with youth; preparing their message to relate to the youth so it would make sense to us. I would go to the alter; I would cry when a word twinged in my spirit; I would be on fire when I left. But as soon as Monday came around and I had other "obligations," that word no longer lingered in me. I got tired of that feeling. I would surround myself in negative situations with negative people, and in the pit of my stomach, I always knew I just didn't belong. I was never at ease. I would always feel guilty after doing things I knew I wasn't supposed to. I was tired of feeling like that. Then I remembered the feeling I would get whenever I was on fire for God. Whenever I would talk to him and seek his guidance and the warm sensation that would pour over me. I always want that feeling. Not just on Sundays at church or Wednesdays at Bible Study. I want to have that feeling even in my darkest hours because I know ultimately God has my back and whatever I am going through, it is not bigger than God. I want that massive amount of faith. So finally, after 21 years of playing around, I decided to dedicate myself to this church. I have yet to be baptized but it is coming next. I am held accountable now, which is fine. The same feeling I get when I know I have class on Monday or an assignment due on Tuesday, I want to feel that way about God. God is waiting to talk to me so I have to go and make time for him. Same scenario. I am very blessed and excited to become apart of this family. :)
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