Earlier this year, I began writing letters to Pops in my notebook but soon neglected it due to laziness. It was on my heart to speak to him in the form of pen and paper for this last day in 2012...
It's been a while since I've taken the time to thoroughly gather my thoughts and talk to you. Although I pray to you daily, I'm not always in the right space (charge it to my head and not my heart).
With this being the last day of the year, I'm reflecting on 2012. The good & bad and ups & downs. All the promises you've kept and blessings you've provided. This has been a MAGNIFICENT year for me. I couldn't think of any better adjective to describe it. I've been overwhelmingly blessed and could never thank you enough....
(1) Baptismal 9/16/2012
(2) Internship @ Parentlink
(3) Lite semester (4 classes)
(4) Meeting Heather Lindsey
(5) Witnessing a Parliament concert first hand and hanging with the band afterwards
(6) Graduating from MU on December 15, 2012 with my daughter walking with me
(7) 3.5 GPA
(8) Candess as my roommate this final semester
(9) Sparing my brother's life
(10) Sparing my aunt's lives
(11) Trip to Chicago !!
(12) Finding my purpose !!!
*Other than number 1, this list was in no specific order of importance*
Just to name a few. It's been so amazing to experience your wonders and be a witness to your greatness. And to think...I was always familiar with who you were but never took the time to actually care to know you..care to seek you or fall in love with you. I was always consumed in myself; my own issues and problems; my own self praises. The image of God that I used to have of You is NOTHING like who you really are. They were all fabrications of many people's perceptions of you...I always took their word without seeking for myself. For that I am sorry.
Better late than never right. I sought you. I found you. I received you. Throughout all circumstances and experiences that seemed to be disastrous and unfavorable during that time, all served a special purpose...bring me back to my first true love.
I'm still so in awe as I sit and reflect on you goodness. Regardless of what others saw/see, thought/think of me, you see me as royalty; heiress to your riches and glory, your child. As a mother, I completely understand the unconditional love for your child. It is mind-blowing the strengths you will go for your child. You never cease to amaze me.
Overall, I just want to praise you for 2012. One of my greater years if you should ask me. I am ultimately excited for 2013 (Number 13: Powerful Blessing from God) I am overly excited to be a witness to wonders as I grow in my relationship with you.
"Lord, as you carry me into the new year, I pray to remain a new creature. To not fall victim to my environment and past temptations or comply with associates who do not care to know you. To not compromise my salvation. To get my butt off the fence of indecisiveness and plant my feet firmly in the land of righteousness. I just want you Lord. Use me at your will. Use me to bring people to you...to use them. No hidden agendas, ulterior motives, or desires of praise and notoriety. Just a huge, whole, and pure heart filled with everything you consist of. Please hear me Lord. Amen..."
The day has finally came and gone. All four years and one extra semester of preparation for 21 seconds walking across a stage in front of hundreds of people. Even now...6 days later...I don't even feel like I am done with school. I just feel like I am on winter break and will be headed back to Columbia once January arrives. It all happened so fast. I didn't have any finals so my last few weeks were pretty lite and really all I had to do was pack. It began to hit me a little that this all was coming to an end...like Addyson's last day of daycare and my last day of work and my last day at my internship. I was literally saying bye to environments I've called home for the past two years. It was approaching waaaaay to fast. I mean I knew I was graduating but DANG...it had arrived that fast!!!!
I remember writing in an older blog post over the summer about my 5 year plan. Part of that 5 year plan was declaring and decreeing that my last semester of undergrad would be the best semester of undergrad that I've ever had. And I say, God has definitely kept his promise. Re-cap:
(1) Only had to take 12 credit hours this semester and Addyson attended class with me on Friday's MEANING I didn't have to wake up early to take her to daycare.
(2) I got saved on September 16, 2012 (day before Addyson's 3rd birthday!)
(3) Parliament came to MU and Candess and I were able to sit on stage and kick it with the band. Even had waffle house with them afterwards and they gave us their drumsticks from the show.
(4) I had the opportunity to meet Heather Lindsey when she spoke at our Pinky Promise event a few weeks ago. Beautiful spirit.
(5) My trip to Chicago over Thanksgiving break. All I can say is, I have felt God moved but not as swiftly as he did during this time. My trip to Chicago is a whole entire blog in itself. Just know that I've found my purpose by going to Chicago.
(6) I ended the semester with a 3.5 (3 A- and 1 B-) I am definitely satisfied
(7) Addyson walking across the stage with me during graduation. One of my proudest moments. She tried to act up during the commencement but even that couldn't stop me from allowing her to walk with me. She had her own cap and gown. Standing ovation. Interviewed by a newspaper. Amazing day
( I got two speeding tickets within 10 days of each other, including graduation day, but I can't let that stop my joy. Thank God for graduation money right)
This leads me to now. I keep getting hit with the infamous question, "So what now?" I said that the next time someone asks me what am I doing post grad, that I was going to say I'm TRAPPIN! But seriously....graduate school is in my plans but I am also taking the semester off to see if that is in God's plan for me. I know I want to go into Non-Profit... it's just a matter of do I really need a Master's Degree to pursue a position in Non-Profit? It just sounds good when talking to people about post-grad plans. Right now I am enjoying my time off, resting my brain, spending time with my daughter, and going through growing pains...AGAIN. I am about to blog about the season I am in real soon.