So this past weekend….was amazing. So simple yet so satisfying. Once again, I felt an array of emotions but all ended well. In a nutshell, I went back to St. Louis over this past weekend with intent to stretch out my weekend as much as possible prior to school starting this Monday (didn’t really work such as life).

I remained pretty much lowkey and stayed in the house majority of the time but when I did step out, I was in for a major surprise.

Friday just started with irritability and agitation. Addyson did the fool all morning JUST BECAUSE I TOLD HER THAT SHE COULDN’T WATCH DORA DOWNSTAIRS BUT THAT SHE HAD TO GO UPSTAIRS IN MY ROOM TO WATCH! CRIED FOR 30 MINUTES STRAIGHT! SHE CHANGED HER WHOLE BREATHING PATTERN! ….but I digress. After that, I remained on edge throughout the remainder of the day.

Addy, Candess (Addy God Mom) and I went to a sushi restaurant later on that day for happy hour. Already agitated from earlier, Addyson spilled a cup of water all over the table. I had to internally count to 10 in order to calm myself down. Snowball affect in effect.

With intentions of going home after happy hour, some of Candess’s Abundant Life church fam were actually in The Loop (where the sushi restaurant was ) to do ministry. Two Fridays out of the month, the youth at the church go to The Loop to stop people, tell them about God, and pray for them. I could tell Candess wanted to stay but due to Addyson already causing me to be irritable, I was ready to go.

Needless to say, they convinced me to stay. We had fellowship at another restaurant, which was amazing. One of the Abundant Life members actually works with children so she was there to play with Addyson and take her off my hands for a few. #GodBeKnowing

Outside of me and not being a regular Abundant Life Member, there was another new face at the table. A girl named Courtney (assuming that is how you spell it). Homeless and 5 months pregnant due to being raped. Abundant Life invited her to sit with us and paid for her meal. Listening to her story was just…I can’t even explain the feeling. Not only being without her necessities, pregnant, also dealing with the demon of homosexuality, not having custody of her first born (five year old son), and still battling an addiction to nicotine….even while she is pregnant.

It did not take long for my irritability to subside. I began looking at Addyson and just thanking God for her; her health, her intelligence, my family support in helping me raise her. I am blessed. To see Courtney, smiling, enjoying her food and our company was just amazing to me. Despite her situation, she still managed to laugh and rub her belly and smile. She says she is excited to know the sex of the baby. She really wants a girl. I gave her the rest of the cash in my purse and told her to get some prenatal pills ASAP. She doesn’t have any type of prenatal care at this point. I gave her some names of resources that could help her and my number that I pray she uses so I can keep in touch with her. I was to see how she is doing and how that child is doing. Even if I never see her again, I have faith that God already has changed her life. As we were getting up to leave, all of us (probably 20-25 of us) all got up to pray for her and her child. I got to rub her belly before she left J

Situations as such really make you appreciate your life…flaws and all. It is always someone dealing with worse situations. That is not something I am proud of or boasting about. Courtney is now a part of my daily prayers…but it definitely increases my gratitude. And to think, I planned on going home after getting sushi. I didn’t want to fellowship. I just wanted to go home. #GodBeKnowing

“When it’s something you most likely don’t feel like doing, you probably need to” (in a spiritual sense)


08/20/2012 8:44pm

BEAUTIFUL. Thanks for sharing this journey.


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